Have Your Own


Dear Dumplin,

A woman must have her own money.

A woman must have her own money.

A woman must have her own money.  Did I tell you that a woman must have her own money?  Money equals freedom. People walk around thinking they are free and they are sadly mistaken. Most people cannot wake up, and do whatever they feel like on that particular day. They need to pay for a place to sleep, food to eat, and clothes to wear. This is just the basics. Do you want to travel? Have nice things? Shop? Then you will need the resources to do that. Freedom is not having to rely on anyone for the things you need.

This sunk in when I read, “The Richest Man in Babylon” by George S. Clason. It is a short read that will certainly be on your required reading list. It’s important to know how to begin, as well as how far you can go with a little financial maturity. Some women rely on men for their financial survival.  Historically, society tells us that women should rely on men for their finances. And, if one day we decide that I should stay home and be with you full time, that’s fine as well. But consider this, if your Dad gets sick, looses his job, or simply makes a financial mistake, what then? That’s a burden one person should not have to bare if they don’t have to.  A marriage is a partnership and partners work together.  Even if I were not married and did not have you, it would still be important for me to have my own money.

As I sit here thinking about the women in my life, on the day before the 103rd annual International Woman’s Day, I realize that almost every single woman in my life is going through a major transition that requires financial resources.  Divorce, engaged, first child, second child, sick child, new job, new career, empty nester, you name it!  The new journey requires new money.  I hope the statistics change by the time you are of working age.  On average, women make only 77 cents for every dollar a man makes.  Absurd right?  Especially when you consider how many single moms raise children and support entire households.  Women work hard and should be compensated accordingly.

As a result, Suze Orman will definitely be on your required reading list.  But more importantly, I want you to be strong enough to force yourself to do the hard work.  You will slip, as we all inevitably do sometimes.  It’s not the end of the world if you make mistakes with your money.  That’s how you learn.  It’s ok!  I look up sometimes and think, “Where did my money go?”  It happens.  You just dust yourself off and start over.   Don’t be afraid to teach yourself new things.  Take a class, and ask questions when you don’t know the answer.

What I want you to know?  Your financial education is worth the effort.



2 thoughts on “Have Your Own

  1. I was JUST posting the other day in Facebook about saving money and financial literacy after seeing that former NBA player Vin Baker lost $100 million from his time in the NBA. I asked people was it institutional racism or do black people need to learn to save more. I’ve posted about financial literacy several times on my page because I guess it bothers me, especially since I have a hard time saving because I wasn’t taught how to and my mom wasn’t taught and I assume her mother wasn’t taught. Financial literacy is so important and it’s funny that you mentioned the wages women make last year because I was just seeing the other day on Facebook about people talking about this and how black women make actually $0.64 to the dollar I think. White women may be the $0.77 cent and I think Latinas make $0.55 here. It’s so. It’s so great that you have these books on a reading list for your daughter. Education of that should start young. Though I struggle with it, I’m trying to fix it. I just wish I could get a better paying job. Hopefully soon. I will be checking out those books. A friend told me some years ago to check out Suzie Orman (sp).

    1. The statistics are truly dreadful. I feel very strongly about women and money. I didn’t have any financial education either (people can’t teach you what the don’t know). Reading the books I mentioned changed my LIFE. My mind changed. Just by reading the right things. I’m certain I will post more about women and money in the future. Thanks so much for reading and commenting! I Iove having conversations about important issues.

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